The joy of double dates

Last night, Alex and I went out to dinner for one of the first times since Anton was born four months ago. (It felt so good to be out!) We met our friends, and at one point, I looked over at Alex telling everyone a story and was struck by how funny and handsome he looked. I love that about double dates: You're forced to take a break from parenting minutiae and see your partner through other people's eyes, and you realize how lucky you are.

Alex, I love you.

P.S. We went to Cafe Cluny, which is our favorite restaurant in NYC; I'd highly recommend it, if you haven't been!

Making love

Do you agree that "making love" is the grossest phrase? This video, of everyone saying "make love" in Woody Allen films, made me laugh out loud and very uncomfortable.

P.S. Annoying words, and Brit speak.

How to say goodbye at a party

Last year, we threw a holiday party, and fifty friends squeezed into our teeny apartment. We drank sparking wine, ate kettle chips and climbed onto the fire escape to tell stories. Everything was going well, but then something started happening...Read More >

It's hard to work at the Onion.

The radio show This American Life has a a great episode where they sat in on an editorial meeting at The Onion. Every week, the comedy writers brainstorm more than 600 fake headlines, but only 16 are picked to run in the newspaper. During the meeting, there's an average of just one laugh for every 100 jokes. Tough crowd! In the interview, the writers explain why some headlines are funny, and some aren't; it's fascinating to hear the nuances.

Here are a few fake headlines that passed the test...

Dolphin Spends Amazing Vacation Swimming with Stockbroker.
Foreign Guy Probably Dressed Very Fashionably For Wherever He’s From.
Man At Salad Bar Has To Say Every Item Aloud As He Adds It To Salad.
Dad’s Been On A Parenting Kick Lately.
Fun-Loving, Laid-Back Woman With A Bit Of A Nerdy Side Joins Online Dating Service.
Pretty Obvious Which Parts Of Wedding Website Written By Groom.
Exercise Ball All the Way Over There.
Eric Clapton Wows Audience with Even Slower Version of Layla.
Two People Who Went To Same College Ruin Evening For Rest Of Group.
Cat Seemed Perfectly Content Right Up Until Point He Bolted Out Of Room.
Mom Spends Beach Vacation Assuming All Household Duties In Closer Proximity To Ocean.
Dad Actually Yelled At That Guy.
Man Still Trying To Find Right Work-Anxiety–Life-Anxiety Balance.
Weird Guy From 2 Jobs Ago Still Liking Woman’s Photos On Facebook.
(Another tough crowd:)

Anyway, the episode was really funny, if you're in the mood. Do you have any other radio shows or podcasts you'd recommend? I have a new thing where I'm trying to go on a weekly walk by myself while listening to radio, just as a little "me time." (Not to be super cheesy about it or anything:) I'd love any recommendations!

P.S. Some funny comics.

(Top photo by Colin via Wikipedia; bottom photo by Alfred Eisenstaedt. TAL episode OfaKind)

New York subway signs experiment

"In New York City, subway conductors have to point at a black and white sign. At every hour of the day. At every stop. They do this to show that they've fully arrived on the platform. We decided to show our appreciation for their work." —Yosef Lerner.

This video is amazing!

Personality test

I'm a sucker for personality tests, so I wanted to post this quiz that my sister sent me: Which state matches your personality?

Here are a few fun facts:
* Wisconsin is the most extroverted state.
* Vermont is the most introverted state.
* Utah is the most agreeable and least neurotic state.
* West Virginia is the most neurotic state.
* Washington, D.C., is the most open-minded state.

Which state did you get? (I got Georgia!) Take the quiz here, and leave your answer below...xoxo

P.S. United States pillows and cutting boards.

Getting massages at home!

When the dating and relationships company HowAboutWe reached out to me about going on a NYC date, I really wanted to say yes. But the catch was: Alex and I are pretty homebound in the evenings. We typically put both kids to bed, then eat dinner and pass out ourselves. We miss date nights! We are so boring! We have watched so many 30 Rock reruns!
But then it occurred to me: What if we could have our date at home? I checked out their site, and then I saw it. AT-HOME COUPLES MASSAGES. SAY WHAT?!
Amazing, right?! Who knew that was even a thing?! We were pinching ourselves. Although HowAboutWe began as an online dating site, they've since launched HowAboutWe for Couples—where they help couples find awesome dates. You browse their list of dates, book the ones you like, and go. They take care of all the details. It's great for people who want to do exciting offbeat stuff but don't have time or energy to plan everything themselves.
After living in New York for twelve years, I thought I had figured out almost everything there was to do here. But I was surprised to see dates I’d never thought of: couples astrology readings, old-school Brooklyn food tours, gondola rides in the East River...and, of course, at-home couples massages.
So, after both boys were in bed, we cracked a bottle of rose and put out bowls of nuts, olives and kettle chips...
...and shoved the toys to the side of the room. :)
Two really nice and friendly massage therapists arrived and set up folding massage tables in our living room.
We provided our own sheets and towels, and they put on relaxing spa music with sounds of rainforests and ocean waves.
Needless to say, it was such an incredible date and definitely the coolest night we've had in ages. What a luxurious treat!!! I've been a basketcase recently with a toddler and newborn, so it was so amazing to do this for ourselves and then just roll into bed after the massage (next to Anton's co-sleeper, haha) instead of commuting home.
I'd highly recommend HowAboutWe for Couples, which has so many fun date ideas. You can sign up for free and browse their dates in New York, San Francisco, Chicago and Seattle (and they're expanding to new cities soon). BONUS: Get $50 off your first date through this link, until December 31st. Thanks so much, HowAboutWe!

(This post was sponsored by HowAboutWe, a service we now plan to use all the time. Thank you for supporting the sponsors that make Cup of Jo possible. Photos by our friend Julia Robbs for Cup of Jo, who stopped by at the beginning and left once the massages started haha. Definitely one of the funnier/more surreal blogging photo shoots:)

Amy Poehler's summer job as a teenager

For this week's New Yorker, Amy Poehler wrote a short essay about her summer job as a teenager: scooping ice cream at Chadwick’s, a local parlor that specialized in sundaes and giant steak fries. It's a sweet read, if you're a Poehler fan.

What odd jobs have you had? I’ve been a snowy-driveway-shoveler, pizza maker, newspaper delivery girl, coffee shop barista, LSAT tutor, receptionist, car washer, unpaid intern and babysitter (for $2.50/hour, that’s how old I am!!).

Plus, just for fun, two more funny photos:
(How psyched are you that Tina Fey and Amy Poehler will be hosting the Golden Globes for the next two years?)

P.S. 16 celebrity yearbook photos, Amy's wise words, and how everyone has a wobbly path to success.

Can you read emotions?

New studies have found that if people read literary fiction for even a few minutes (as opposed to popular fiction or serious nonfiction), they perform better on tests measuring empathy and emotional intelligence. Isn't that fascinating? And it makes sense, since literary fiction often describes the characters' internal lives in great detail and puts the reader in someone else's shoes.

The New York Times also ran an online quiz to see how well you can read people's emotions just by seeing their eyes. Take it here! How did you do? Leave your score below. I got a 29/36 so that is the one to beat for now, haha.

P.S. A famous personality test, and are you an introvert or extrovert?

Did you have sex on your wedding night?

Couples are expected to have wild sex on their wedding night, but I've always been curious about...Read More >

Are you scared of public speaking?

Alex hates public speaking but sometimes has to make speeches for his job. He stresses out the whole night before. Luckily, I heard about a cool trick...

Make a fist with your left hand.

"Freaking out is primarily associated with the left hemisphere of the brain," wrote The Atlantic, so researchers found that making a fist with your left hand helps "draw focus away from the left hemisphere" and turns off the worrying part of your brain.

Cool, right? Will you try it? Do you find public speaking nerve-wracking?

P.S. My elevator phobia.

(Photo of Yves Saint Laurent being pushed onstage, Paris, 1986, via Messy Nessy Chic)

Wise words

"Nine times out of ten, you probably aren’t having a full-on nervous breakdown—you just need a cup of tea and a biscuit."

— British writer Caitlin Moran in her hilarious, wonderful letter to her daughter

(Photo of me from a while back)

11 untranslatable words from other countries

Ella Frances Sanders illustrated untranslatable words from other languages, and they're so lovely...
Read More >

Our fourth anniversary

Today is our fourth anniversary! Last night, Alex and I reminisced by looking through photos from when we were first dating...
This was the weekend he met my dad. How cute is he without a beard? (Although I'll never let him shave.)
Alex's old Brooklyn apartment had dark red walls in the living room, which I remember thinking was so cool and masculine when I went over there for the first time. We had a Friday night ritual of listening to music, watching movies and eating too much cheese.
Here we were at our friend's dinner party, looking out at the Manhattan skyline. How amazing was the view from their apartment?!
On our first trip together—to Berlin for ten days. I was so nervous that we'd run out of things to talk about! (We didn't.)
Visiting my grandmother in Cornwall...
...and on a walk with my family. (My grandparents' town is so small that if you send them a letter, you have to write "Polruan-by-Fowey" on the envelope so the mail carrier can figure out how to find it.)
Alex proposed on a sailboat in the Hudson River. The boat kept tilting from side to side, so I had to stick my hand into his backpack so he could put the ring on safely!
Saying our vows four years ago. Best decision I ever made.

Tonight we're sneaking away from the babies and going out to a neighborhood Italian restaurant, Gradisca, where the owner flies his mama in from Bologna to make pasta! And of course we'll meet there:)

Happy Anniversary, Alex! I love you.

Do you feel comfortable naked?

When I was dating my college boyfriend, I was pretty shy about letting him see me naked. In bed, I'd drape myself in sheets, and if I had to leave the bedroom, I'd grab a towel, or if there wasn't one, I'd slowly back out of the room, which in hindsight must have looked insane.

Thankfully nowadays I feel much more comfortable walking around starkers. Partly because I'm older and wiser (imperfections are beautiful! people aren't that critical!) and also because I'm married and know Alex loves me and is stuck with me. :)

Funnily enough, a new study says that women feel happiest with their naked bodies at 34 (my exact age)—which is, as Jezebel put it, "the magical age when, after 20 years of being overly self-critical, they finally realize how great they really are—just in time for the curtain call of the real shit show that is aging." Made me laugh.

I'm curious: On a scale of 1 to 10, how comfortable do you feel naked?

P.S. The secret to relationships, and would you wait to kiss until your wedding day?